:: Follow The Voice In Your Heart ::

We are the keepers of our own heart.

So what is it about following the voice in your heart?

Some hear the voice but are deaf to it...

Some listen too much to the voice in their head,

they ignore the one in their heart.

So just what is it about following the voice in your heart?

Just ask the keeper of this blog...

The keeper of her own heart.

*the keeper*

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:: Xuanwan ::
:: 12/09/84 ::
:: NUS undergrad ::
:: FASS ::

*loves *

:: my family ::
:: andrew ho ::
:: badminton ::
:: bubble tea ::
:: babies ::
:: singing ::
:: sleeping ::
:: slacking ::
:: surprises ::

*moodswings *

*wishlist *

~~:: finish the whole series of Sex & The City ::~~
~~:: to enjoy whatever modules I'll be doing next sem ::~~
:: not be kicked out of NUS and have to go sell bubble tea ::
:: rid the world of nasty jerks ::
~~:: to get out of boring S'pore for holiday! ::~~

Monday, March 14, 2005

Was juz having this long chat wif my aunt over dinner... ok I always have long chats wif her when I cum to her hostel to stay for the nite. Diz time we were discussing abt my eldest aunt, she's the HOD physics of a sec sch, smart and capable... draws a high-end salary and lives in a terrace house. Prob is she is living a life I hope I'll never ever have to... wif a husband who does nothing but sticks his butt on his study table everyday (he's a lecturer in ngee ann poly), 2 kids, one a super rebellious ger and a little kid boy... plus my super hard-to-handle grandmother, who is her mother. Now dat the rebellious ger (who is onli pri 5, and noes how to apply make-up better than many pple I noe) is having failing grades... pple who dunno, which includes my other uncles, think that it's her fault cos she did not have time for her kids, everyday teaching in sch. Now they're asking her to quit her high-paying job to becum a great full-time mother. Her husband will be retiring in 2 yrs time, so who will provide for the family once he retires? And it doesn't help to have this old mother in the house who is more hinderance than help, who adds in her "salt and vinegar" everytime an arguments occurs in the house. My poor auntie looks at least 10 yrs older than her age, and has frequesnt headaches with more illnesses coming her way. And her onli entertainment, which is to go catch a film once in a while wif my mum and my 2nd aunt, is being condemned by my uncles, saying how could she go out and watch movie and not spend time helping her kids wif their hw? Why issit dat no one questions if her husnamd is doing anything den? She has to rush back home everyday after sch to teach and discipline them, and onli at 10.30pm when they've went to bed then she'll bring out her students' assignments to mark till midnight...

And my aunt, the one I'm staying wif now in the hostel, told mi dat my eldest aunt actually wanted to remain single wif her one... and they were already planning to go get an apartment themselves to share. Until sum idiot introduced her present husband to her... she got married at almost 40... Then I was asking my aunt now wad will it be like for my eldest aunt now if she had remain single wif her... I bet she'll be having a much better life then wad she is going thro now. Wif her salary, to juz support one person, she can afford to splurge on herself lyk hell... and to hell wif those illnesses and headaches... to hell wif those pple who feels she is not doing enough as a mother. If I had a kids lyk that ger, I tink I may get a stroke veri soon...

My eldest aunt's a great person... since young I'd heard so much praises abt her frm my uncles and aunts, abt wad a great eldest sis she is and how I should learn frm her to be a good sis to my siblings too. She's a great teacher, she saved my physics, frm a fail grade to B3... and this is after she started teaching mi juz one month before the O's. And my bro oso got taught by her and he got an A2 for his combined sci... She's the aunt who is the most approachable and whenever we go on holiday, she is the one who will always have biscuits wif her in case anyone of us gets hungry on the long coach rides. And I find it totally ridiculous dat pple are asking her to give up her job for her kids... and it's not lyk her kids are worth it. Lyk wad my 2nd aunt told mi, it's always a gamble to sacrifice wad u have for urself, for sumone else... in this case she can never noe wad are the chances of her kid repaying her one day... it's not a 50-50 chance, I noe the ger, the whole family noes the ger... my 2nd aunt says if my eldest aunt's lucky, it'll be a 30-70 chance... 30% dat she'll repay her one day and be a filial ger, and 70% she'll throw her mother out once she gained independence.

Then looking at my 2nd aunt who is single and stays alone... she takes such good care of herself, she looks no more than 45, when she's alr 50 plus. She drives her own car and has her own flat. She splurges on shoes and bags for her indulgence... she does anything she wants to... and does not have to account for anybody. Ok it'll be unfair if I'm to use this 2 extreme examples to compare... let's bring in my mum, the 3rd sister then. She has a great husband, and 3 kids... who are not exactly genius material, a bit naughty and rebellious sumtimes...but still obedient (*grinz*). She gotta cook and iron after a long day at sch, but she has my dad to help out wif the housework... and ya, my dad's butt is anywhere but on sum study room chair. And he fetches my mum wherever she wants to go, and on days she had to go for medical check-up he'll take leave to drive her there, and then accompany her to go shopping at TANGS (their fav shopping mall)... basement 1 (kitchen stuff..!)

So wad's the moral of the story???

If u are not lucky enough to find a great guy to marry... then DUN get married. Either u find a great guy and get married, or u stay a happy single life. You should never ever settle for a non-great guy and torture urself after marriage...

Let the story of the 3 sisters enlighten you... haha. (tink un-TS) How can u still not be convinced???

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* xuan * listened
@ |3/14/2005 11:05:00 PM|