:: Follow The Voice In Your Heart ::

We are the keepers of our own heart.

So what is it about following the voice in your heart?

Some hear the voice but are deaf to it...

Some listen too much to the voice in their head,

they ignore the one in their heart.

So just what is it about following the voice in your heart?

Just ask the keeper of this blog...

The keeper of her own heart.

*the keeper*

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:: Xuanwan ::
:: 12/09/84 ::
:: NUS undergrad ::
:: FASS ::

*loves *

:: my family ::
:: andrew ho ::
:: badminton ::
:: bubble tea ::
:: babies ::
:: singing ::
:: sleeping ::
:: slacking ::
:: surprises ::

*moodswings *

*wishlist *

~~:: finish the whole series of Sex & The City ::~~
~~:: to enjoy whatever modules I'll be doing next sem ::~~
:: not be kicked out of NUS and have to go sell bubble tea ::
:: rid the world of nasty jerks ::
~~:: to get out of boring S'pore for holiday! ::~~

Friday, May 13, 2005

I noe this is gg to make mi sound realli loser... but juz half an hr ago, I'm hooked onto online relationship forums... overseas ones at least. I tink it muz be the nightly episodes of Sex and The City, plus, I had a realli long tok wif Weichang (frm my TS prac grp) abt r/s, and even told her abt my past crushes. It sounds damn weird to tell a fren abt all these... after having trashed out the slightest possibility of any good guy left in the world, and having this impression dat r/s dun last etc etc. And I find dat after I talked to her abt the past, the younger days when "love" seems so romantic and a fantasy to many, including myself, started to cum back... and the feeling is so strange. I used to have so many dreams abt a romantic r/s, having to be wif a guy I realli love, to be happily married ever after. Wad happened as I grew older? Sumwhere along the way... I became more realistic, pragmatic and practical....

And I decided to search for relationship forums online, to bring back the inoocent schoolgirl days... And if u got the correct ones... they are realli good! Dun click on the trashy ones... crap. I started reading on threads wif topics abt relationship problems... there's this long one wif this ger saying her love problem, and asking for opinions and stuff. And the stuff pple post are quite good... sum are realli good advice. And after reading thro a few long threads... I'm brought back to my younger days... where it's so much simpler. You have a crush on this guy, u tink abt him all day... in sch, at home, even when u slp. You tell ur frenz all abt him, how cute he is and he smiled at u and stuff... I mean, it was all so innocent and simple... my crush smile at mi, I'm floating for the rest of the day. If he actually toks to mi, I make sure I repeat my story as many times to as many the number of frenz I have.

Now... dun tok abt wad will I do when my crush smiles at mi... in the first place it's so darn hard and almost impossible to develop a crush. Issit my age? Am I too old for such stuff? Ok, and let's say u realli have a crush. Instead of finding out who he hangs out wif, whether any of his frens overlap into my circle of frenz... I will try to find out where he cum frm, and den try to calculate whether he has a promising future ahead of him. Best if I can find out wad kinda family backgrnd he cum frm. Ok... dat sounds too realistic and unromantic? But I juz realized dats wad became of mi now...

Maybe it's also cos of the number of broken r/s I witnessed over the years... the number of "promising" couples breaking up... the number of guys I thought were "good", who turned out to be jerks. It's juz so disappointing and depressing.

I'm not putting off the thought of the possibility of having a pure romantic, and everlasting r/s... juz dat......... dat will be SO DIFFICULT...

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* xuan * listened
@ |5/13/2005 04:45:00 AM|